Dib bit down firmly on his lip before shakily stepping forward and pulling him slowly up the creaky stairs. Since it was dark, he squinted his eyes in an attempt to see a bit clearer in the small amount of light that he had. As he slowly made his way up the stairs, whispering the Irken’s name in an attempt to draw him out from his hiding place. In a situation such as this, Dib preferred to know where Zim was rather than him be out of sight with the possibility of a surprise attack.
After a minute of crawling painfully slow up the stairs, he finally made it to the top with the sight of the illuminated room at the end of the hallway; the same room his sister’s decomposing body lay on the metal table.That light was still on, but there weren’t any sounds. Either the Irken was being especially quiet, or he wasn't there at all.
Dib’s feet were planted deeply where he stood, hesitating to go any closer to the room. Memories and dreadful images of what lay in that room began to torture him again the longer he stood staring at that room. He wouldn’t budge any further towards the room now, so he began to make small noises to try and coax the other from wherever it was that he was hiding.
Zim was not coming or responding to the sounds, not even with hisses or gurgles that he usually made. It was just quiet, but there was a small shift in the shadow in the room at the end of the hall.
Dib squinted his eyes a bit more as the shadow shifted. He remained completely still for about thirty seconds before his undying curiosity got the best of him and he forced his foot forward in a small step. Before his mind even had a moment to protest, he was stepping silently towards the dreaded room ever so slowly as not to cause anymore noise. The closer he got, the more he could see the shadow moving. Back and forth, but it never seemed to shift to get up and leave the room.
Dib was in front of the doorway now, though he stood off to the side just so his left eye poked around the corner to look into the room. He breathed slowly and quietly as he took in everything he saw now.
Zim was in there, in full view as he stared off at the wall. And there lie Gaz's body, parts eaten away and her clothing in shreds. The deranged Irken's hand shakily moved through her hair, petting it back slowly as he stared at the wall.
The chilling scene caused Dib’s eyes to widen and his mouth the gape slightly, a small chill running down his spine. His breathing grew a little stiff and shallow for a moment but it had never gotten too loud as to give his position away.
Zim seemed too busy with the female though, stroking over her hair. The normal purple color was matted together with dried blood, her fierce aggression no more. Zim leaned down to her neck, almost seeming to be kissing it at first glance.
Though horrified, Dib couldn’t help but be a little curious as well. The scene was almost sentimental, though horrible nonetheless. He couldn’t help but wonder what was going through Zim’s deranged mind in this moment, or even if anything was going through his mind at all.
It was strange to see the calm in the beast after brutally killing her. He continued to stroke her hair, face pressed slightly to her cut neck as his lekku lowered back almost in a soothed manner.
Dib wasn’t focused on his sister’s mangled body now, but more on the Irken’s state now. Zim combed through her hair almost affectionately as he laid there. Maybe a small part of his surviving conscious forced him to feel a bit of remorse toward his actions.
Even as he avoided gazing at Gaz’s body, the stench was something that just couldn’t be ignored. Dib had held himself from causing too much of a fuss over it, but now it was unbearable. As much as he tried to hold back, he couldn’t suppress the audible gag that escaped his throat. His eyes widened as all of his movement ceased as he knew Zim surely took notice of such a disturbance.
Zim's head snapped up at the sickened sound, seeming startled to find him slipping in under the radar. His lekku quirked back up as his lips parted in a snarl, crawling over his sister as he never took his eyes from him. He then sprang from the table, screeching as he tackled the human out to the hallway.
Dib let out a small squeal as the other lunged onto him. He kept his balance for three steps until he finally collided with the floor violently, grunting in pain as the back of his head hit harshly against the surface. The boy’s eyes opened wide and they flicked back and forth as he looked for the Irken.
Zim growled as he crawled to him, lekku still perked as he eyed him dangerously. He soon molded to his body in a similar way he had with Gaz, his hand shakily stroking that scythe lock there.
Dib began to panic a little, the rate of his breathing increasing slightly. He dared not to even blink his eyes now as he lay helplessly in the other’s grip. Zim pressed his face to his neck like he did with Gaz, giving a sound like a distressed whine as he clutched him. It was almost like he felt very trapped and depressed, only wanting a hug to soothe his poor broken mind.
In a way, Dib could almost feel this sense of depression and forced himself to calm down for Zim’s sake. Though, he was still on edge and didn’t allow himself to move a muscle, only to calm his breathing.
Zim breathed heavily into his neck, seeming very distressed as he clutched onto him. It must be different from holding a cold corpse, as he rubbed his face against his neck as if to nuzzle it.
After a minute more or so of no attacks, no biting or threats to claw his face off, Dib allowed his body to go almost completely lax in Zim’s arms and closed his eyes. It was odd... He didn’t feel there was a threat now. If anything, he felt more relaxed with the other now, more so than he had in quite a while.
Zim seemed less tense the second Dib loosened his body. Without the belief that the other would spring on him, he was actually pretty gentle. His arms loosened from their desperate grip to a similar calm hold like he had with Gaz. The way his behavior fluctuated was almost medically fascinating.
Dib inhaled stiffly before opening his eyes to look back up at the other. After a minute of going back and forth through all of the stupid ideas in his mind, he lifted a hand and very lightly placed it on one of Zim’s, almost in a way to try and comfort him. He hoped this wouldn’t provoke an attack though..
Zim looked up sharply at this, staring at him almost fearfully. He didn't seem to want to fight today, and was almost pleading him with his eyes not to.
Dib was aware in the small shift of Zim’s behaviour now, his thumb running ever so smoothly over the other’s hand. “It’s... Alright...” He whispered almost inaudibly.
Zim breathed a bit heavily, as if fearing what the other was going to do. One second, he wanted to kill him and destroy his sanity, while the next he wanted to hold him. Maybe the pills were stabilizing Dib's mind, which in turn was starting to stabilize Zim.
What if Dr. Gaul had been right after all?
Even with Zim’s slight fear, Dib stuck firm to his attempt to reassure him and continued to stroke the other’s hand with his thumb.
As he lay here, he couldn’t help but try and put all of the pieces together his head. Everything the doctor had told him just made so much sense now. Zim was appearing less frequently, and now he seemed to be calm and almost affectionate in a way. But this couldn’t all just be in his head.. It was all too real to just be a delusion... Especially this moment. Dib tried to force the thought away though as it began to distress him again and he didn’t want to upset the deadly Irken which held him in his arms now.
Zim eventually calmed enough to resume the creepy cuddling. He held him close and breathed into his neck. This would also call into question his psychiatrist's accusation of him being a little homosexual. Of course, the fact that Dib was actually somewhat enjoying this moment only heightened the chance of this being a correct accusation. And to his memory, he could actually recall a few times where the boy had found Zim somewhat.. Intriguing. Of course, he didn’t exactly know why he felt this way at times, but he wouldn’t deny now that there was some sort of attraction in the past.
Zim continued to hold onto him, portraying that he didn't want to let him go anytime soon. One hand continued to pet his head, while he kept his lips at his neck, as if contemplating whether to kiss or bite.
Dib closed his eyes lightly, breathing deeply and slowly in an attempt to keep the other from biting the soft flesh there. His thumb never stopped caressing the Irken’s hand almost in the way he had rubbed Einstein’s cheek to calm him down.
It was strange as it seemed to have the same effect on him as the dog. His eyes even closed after a moment as he laid there against him. It would be the perfect opportunity to kill him and be rid of the horror, but no matter how badly Dib wanted this nightmare to be over, there was no way he could bring himself to kill Zim. Just the very thought of him being dead scared him, so this was out of the question. Dib simply sat there in the deadly alien’s arms, completely vulnerable to any surprise attacks.
Zim gave a sound, almost like he was trying to purr, but also sounding like he was in the middle of drowning. He opened his jaws and bit into his neck, but not very hard.
At this, Dib’s eyes opened slowly and he looked over to Zim in a bit of discomfort. Even though the grip was soft, he wasn’t too fond of the razor sharp teeth being clamped on such a vital part of his body. His thumb continued to caress the others hand though, as if this were the only thing keeping him at bay. But, Zim's teeth never actually broke the skin as he held the sensitive flesh captive between the razors. He nibbled lightly, sending light tingles through the skin as though he might break it. This caused the boy to shiver slightly in the others grasp, sighing slightly in an attempt to keep himself calm for both of their sakes. He was in no mood to fight today either, and he was determined to keep the other calm as long as he could.
It almost seemed like a love bite now as he flexed his jaws to prick it gently. He tightened his hand in his hair almost painfully as he grabbed a fistful.
At this sudden grip, Dib let out a small squeak and clenched his eyes firmly shut again. He naturally leaned into the other now as well, as if anticipating more.
Zim growled lowly, but it didn't sound too threatening. He moved down to his collarbone and bit, handling him a bit rougher than he did Gaz. Dib opened an eye at this and took a deep breath and gripped the others hand slightly tighter, as if silently pleading for him not to harm him now.
Zim growled again as he pushed his hand down into the carpet to keep it there. Maybe this is how it had started off with Gaz; Zim trying to reach her through somewhat struggled kind touches, and Gaz was too violent and moody to accept that and fought him, which resulted in her death.
Dib remained calm, however, as he refused to end up with the same fate his sister faced. He let out a small sigh, which seemed to be mixed with a whimper as he pressed into the other again.
Zim soon relaxed his roughness again as he still held a fistful of hair, but more like a lover would do while in a heated make out session. He pressed the smooth area where his nose would be to the others neck and rubbed it gently.
Dib leaned his head back slightly at this touch. He still wasn’t able to wrap his mind around the fact that he was laying here with this monster and he hadn’t turned to hurt him yet; it was hard to tell what was going on in that malfunctioning brain. He seemed to almost believe Dib was a close friend, even lover with how gentle he was being currently. It was strange to see such a rough and violent alien be so... tender.
Even though Zim was tender now, his mood could turn at any moment and he could easily rip the him to shreds, and he was well aware of it. The worst part of it all was that Zim was hard to read in this insane state of mind, so an attack was nearly undetectable. Dib began to wonder now if this were some kind of trap, but he enjoyed this moment of peace between them nonetheless.
Zim soon got a bit more aggressive and began handling him a bit rougher. He crawled over Dib so he was staring down at his face, his own still that same blank one. "IB..." He muttered as he clutched the front of his shirt, unsure if he wanted to shake him to pieces or hold him close. Of course, this sudden turn worried the boy and he tensed for a moment, his eyes widening to stare into those hollow eyes. He remembered that he needed to remain calm though and took a deep breath, his body loosening again when he exhaled.
Zim still clutched onto his shirt tightly, though his outer shell began to crack away just from the expression on his face. He seemed to look almost depressed, lowering his head and pressing it into his chest, trembling weakly.
Dib’s eyes flicked down towards the other now, staring at him with some concern for both himself and Zim. Being in Zim’s arms was worrisome enough, but now with the Irken on top of him like this he was even more vulnerable and he wanted to get out of this position as soon as he could. After several minutes passed without a single sound from Zim, Dib raised a trembling hand up and very lightly touched the back of Zim’s head, whispering very quietly, “Z-Zim..?”
With that, Zim began to scream. He leaned his head back as he screamed, trembling and seizing his body up simultaneously. He continued his horrifying meltdown for about ten minutes before he went limp again. After such a long time of Zim screaming at an ear-splitting volume, Dib was almost disoriented when he had gone quiet again. He was completely helpless now; a sudden movement now was sure to spark an attack from Zim, especially after such a violent tantrum. Dib lightly placed his shaking right hand on the others shoulder, rubbing it hesitantly with his thumb like he had been doing before in an attempt to keep him calm.
Zim wheezed for a moment, seeming to be out of breath. He suddenly squeezed onto Dib's hand, as much as he could manage. He muttered something unheard, trying to get it out of his lungs with the last bit of air present.
Dib winced at the tight squeeze, but the small pain was soon forgotten at the sound of the other’s attempt to speak. His eyes widened and his breathing turned to small pants as he tried to decipher exactly what the Irken had tried to say. He took a deep breath before ever so slowly sitting up as not to startle to the other. He supported Zim with his free hand so he remained on his lap as he sat upwards. Soon, the two were staring eye to vacant eye. After getting over the small shock of those shallow eyes, Dib tilted his head slightly as he remembered what the other had attempted to gargle. “W-what did y-you say...?” He asked quietly.
Zim gripped onto his collar again, panted harshly. He looked up at him, a faint spark of his old self appearing for no more than a mere second as he shouted at him. "HELP ME!!!"